Please, God, Let it be alright

I pray to you.
I am down on my knees, with eyes full of tears and a head full of hate, remorse, and fear.
I feel as if my soul is about to burst forth and beat upon my shaking body until all the life has fled from it.
Why is it that I am always being tested? I need to find solace in something. I need my mind to calm down long enough for my body to recover.
I always thought I needed someone who could help me, but in times like these, I realize that I can't look anyone in the eye long enough for that to even matter.

This is hell, and I see no end to this black tunnel that I am in.
I love so much, but deserve none. Any love I receive is like a stabbing pain in my chest, and that's why I want those that give me nothing in return. They are my penance.

Please, God, let it be alright - let me sleep tonight, and look at tomorrow in a new, hopeful light.

I pray to you God, let it be alright.